The day after my dedication I felt really good, other than when I thought about that voice from the night before. I told myself it wasn't real, that it didn't really happen, but deep down within I knew better. It had happened. Something, someone, had called my name. Chill bumps came up on my skin every time I thought of it.
I went through my day like I would any other. Got out of bed, had coffee, hung out with the girlfriend and my best friend. When it was time to get ready for work I did my normal 150 pushups and 150 situps and then I jumped into the shower and washed up. My work place was right around a mile or so from the house so I walked for the fresh air and exercise. My work day was basic but I was sort of in auto-pilot mode. After I clocked out I walked home and changed out of my work clothes and plopped down in front of my altar. I stuck an incense in the burner and lit it along with a handful of candles, including the ones on the very back of the altar the represented Cronos, Gaia, and myself. I said a blessing and prayer and sat back cross-legged on the floor, hands on my knees. After clearing my mind in the usually manor I sat in a light meditative stance for quite a few minutes. I suppose somewhere around a half an hour passed. I wasn't really meditating deeply like I sometimes did but more so quietly reflecting on the dedication ritual I had performed the day before. I had such wonderful feelings when I thought of it. It had felt so real and empowering even though the majority had been carried out in the astral. I opened my eyes and looked at my altar. I felt very good about it.. but I wasn't so sure about the holy bible. I knew that it was very non traditional to mingle the holy bible with witchcraft but was not unheard of. As far as using it on the altar, I have no idea if others had ever done such a thing or not. Later I learned that a founder of one of the very first British Traditional Witchcraft Traditions, Alexandrian Wicca, had kept a small statue of Jesus Christ on his altar or mantle for some time. I decided to keep it the way it was for now. Rising to my knees I snuffed the candles out but left what little bit of the incense there was left to finish burning. I stood up and walked over to turn the lights off before I laid down. I wasn't quite ready for bed yet, but I enjoyed laying down after meditating because of the peaceful floaty feeling it left me with. It was like I felt more alive somehow. I was laying there with my head on the pillow, thoughts bouncing around in my head, trying to focus my attention on one question at a time. What, or rather who, had that voice last night belonged to? Had it really came from the altar because It had sure sounded like it. Why had it sounded so ancient, yet somehow familiar? Was it good or was it bad, and why had it felt so cold and terrifying? And the most important question in my mind: was it the Devil, or was it a God? After posing those words in my mind my world was turned upside down. The moment I had posed the last question in my mind, "was it the Devil, or was it a God," the very same ancient sounding raspy yet extremely strong voice from the night before spoke up from the left side of my room. The voice answered my question in a single eloquent string of simple but profound words. After that night I would never look at things the same, but in the moment I froze up, in awe, in terror, in utter disbelief, and so many more powerful emotions that I can not even describe. If you have ever read one of the many biblical accounts of men encountering an angel or God himself, it is the best comparison that I can think of because If I had been standing I too would have fallen to my knees and hid my face just as they did.
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December 2018
AuthorWriter, nature lover, poet, pagan, occultist and blogger. Categories
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